The very fact you're reading this means there's a good chance you consider yourself a car enthusiast. But because there's no badge, license or award which certifies you as a fully-fledged car enthusiast there's bound to be a few fakers in the mix. And while generally that's no cause for concern, there are a few types of faux car fanatics which cast their moronic shadow over the hobby as a whole.

Below are the profiles of three of the most common 'car enthusiast' wannabes to watch out for.





The 'Customizer'
This specimen can often be found hanging out with similar types surrounded by a range of horrifically modified base-model family cars. When in conversation with a 'customizer' it will immediately become apparent to the casual observer that they have no idea how a car works. However they will claim to know everything - even to the point of making up elaborate stories and explanations in an attempt to cover up their lack of knowledge. The customizer may also display a range of performance product stickers on their car, including the obligatory NOS sign, without actually owning any of the parts.

Although sometimes difficult, the 'customizer' should not be confused with the 'real customizer' who actually takes the time to redesign and modify cars to a high level of finish and quality.







The 'Fact Checker'
While all automotive enthusiasts will usually retain a number of car related facts and specifications in their head at all times, the 'Fact Checker' will take this phenomenon to an obsessive level. Even to the point of hysterical confrontation when his facts are questioned or disputed. The 'Fact Checker' usually spends their time analyzing and checking everyone else's automotive conversations or forum posts. When an error is found the 'Fact Checker' will pounce instantly and without mercy, berating the hapless person who made the mistake until the original topic of conversation is lost in a sea of facts, figures and dates. The 'Fact Checker' usually operates alone - basically because nobody else wants to listen to their crap.








The 'Showoff'
The 'Showoff' usually has no genuine interest in cars. But they, or a close relative - usually daddy, have a sizable bank balance and the ability to buy the latest and greatest motors. The 'Showoff' will often accessorize their vehicle with a range of expensive but completely tasteless products - usually involving some sort of underbody lighting. When questioned about their vehicle the 'Showoff', instead of merely answering the question, will launch into a well rehearsed speech about how there is no faster car in town, how cool they are, and how you will never own a better car than them.

Thankfully due to their limited intelligence and overactive ego the 'Showoff' will often write off their pride and joy within a short space of time. After which they are sometimes relegated to a more basic form of transport.








In short, to be a true car enthusiast you don't need to have an exhaustive memory of automotive trivia, a comprehensive understanding of mechanical engineering, or a premium sports car.

What you do need is a genuine interest in cars and their capabilities. Whether it's their ability to fly around a race track (in the right hands), the fact they can be used to take people on road trips across continents and see all the sights you miss in an airplane, or the way they can be tailored and modified in innumerable ways to suit the owners tastes and needs.